In the final week of Women’s History Month, I have decided to tackle a topic that has been on my mind for awhile. It is not so much a topic actually but rather an item of clothing. A few years back, my father returned from his time in Afghanistan with a gift. He brought his westernized, feminist, know it all daughter something extraordinary and like nothing I owned. He brought me a burqa. I want to share this burqa with you and try to respectfully encourage some awareness about the experience of wearing this article of clothing in a country very different from our own.
Truth be told, this is my second burqa. When I was a child, my father went to Afghanistan and brought me back a smaller burqa, one that actually fit on one of my Barbie’s perfectly. This burqa seemed part of another world, a piece of clothing I didn’t exactly understand but my Barbie wore from time to time while she went about her very important Barbie business.
While I was pregnant with my second child, my father brought me my second burqa. This time is was large enough for me to wear. I couldn‘t thank him enough, I was grateful to finally own one myself.
Why would that be?
First let me explain the burqa – or try to. The burka is worn by women in Afghanistan. Traditionally, it has been expected that women cover themselves entirely in a burqa whenever in public. It is said to be a matter of honor and one both men and women have upheld respectfully. And while this tradition has given way to western influences and fashion trends in recent years – perhaps with simple head coverings rather than a full length burqa – the Taliban do enforce the burka. In fact, in the eyes of the Taliban, it has meant a woman’s death if she doesn’t wear one in public. Regardless, enforced or not, women in provinces all over Afghanistan wear these coverings. (Please note that women cover themselves in many Islamic countries also, each garment having different names and social expectations.)
Are you a mother? If so, imagine yourself doing what you do: working, chasing down children, doing errands, cleaning, cooking, caring for your families entirely covered head to toe in a burka while in public. It is an awesome feat. Whether a cultural choice or not, I truly respect the women who wear them.
But you see this is all I understand about the burqa. I know what my father tells me and what I have read in books. So what do I really know or truly understand about its history or its meaning – positive or otherwise? I don’t. All that I do know now is what it feels like to wear one – and that has only been briefly.
(Oh yes, here I am. A privileged, American woman – annoyed when she has to wear a bra in public – and now I have a burqa and I want to see what its like. Groan. How condescending that sounds. But I don’t mean it that way. I am simply wanting to learn, to get it, to share this experience, if only for a moment.)
So I have tried on my burqa many times and here is what this western woman experienced. First of all, the burqa is hot. I guess they used to be made of more breathable cotton but newer ones are made with synthetic material so that they keep their color and their creases. And it is very hard to see through the burqa, but maybe I’m just not used to it. Also I initially thought my head was really big because the top of the burqa did not fit on my head well, it was constricting. After doing further research, I have learned this is typical for most women wearing one and it is not comfortable at all. And finally, its not at all easy to breathe in. There is no vent for the nose or mouth. I just can’t breathe in it for long. That’s why I always take it right off. I can’t breathe. I feel claustrophobic and closed in. So chasing children? Carrying food back from the store? I can’t imagine.
Now I am sure there are readers ready to discuss the matter of women’s repression in Afghanistan. And I am sure there are readers who feel offended by any lack of respect for the burqa and its place in Afghanistan tradition. While I certainly have my views, my post is not meant to judge the purpose behind the burqa. I am simply sharing the experience of a burqa, an experience many women have daily and I don’t. If you ever have the chance to try one on, please do if only to honor a woman’s lifestyle someplace far from our streets of Main Street, U.S.A.
And finally, a quick note. Do you know where I keep my burqa? It is kept in my closet, draped over the box which contains my carefully preserved wedding dress. It just seems fitting. After all, we too wear constricting garments which are expected of us. It’s just what women do here.
Sometimes I start into my day only to realize the world is out to get me. Before the sun has even begun to peak through the trees beyond our back ponds, I have got it alllll figured out – the universe has my backside in its cross hairs.
Oh, you think I’m over reacting? I’m not. This is real. This is war and apparently I am decidedly the axis of evil. Stay on my side, ok? Don’t turn against me too. We need to round up our forces. Let me repeat myself. The world is out to get me. Help.
Here’s what happens. When I wake up on those mornings, right away I know. Something isn’t quite right. As soon as they run out to the living room, my pajama clad children have upped their whines to decibels which call dogs for miles. I know their shtick. They probably have it all planned (you know, who would nag me about what and for how long) way before I get them out of bed. Oh and one of my boys has coincidentally sprouted a cold- green boogers flowing forth, awaiting my tissue. What – did he spend the entire day before licking shopping cart handles in preparation?
And then I arrive in the kitchen and the dishes are certainly dirtier than they were when I went to bed. What? Was my husband up late night dirtying extra plates just for fun? And no PRE-RINSE!?!?!!!!! No pre-rinse??? So now its all crusted FOREVER!!!!!! I’m speechless.
And what was that? The garbage men have come and gone a full hour before they normally do? Oh, right. Bloody typical. And then, while I try and make a hasty one slipper on, one slipper off mad dash out to the corner with the trash anyway, the whole thing dumps over. Someone over filled it, someone broke its wheel, someone wants to make me miserable.
Don’t you SEE whats going on here?
I know then and there, while my children pretend not to scheme behind my back over their bowls of cereal, its time to get my game face on. Oh yeah. I wasn’t born yesterday. I know when someone has pasted a “drive me frickin’ nuts today” sign on my back. I can hear the snickering from my children, my husband, the trash men. I know their game.
And then my husband emerges and my anger turns inward. He hasn’t even made eye contact. He hasn’t even said good morning. He hardly knows I exist.
I look like shit, don’t I?
That’s right. My husband doesn’t even think his own wife is attractive. What should I expect. Not like I even have time to look nice EVER. Not like we ever GO on any DATES or anything so why should I bother, right? I’m going to be 36 this year. I am merely the dried up, raisin husk of the woman he married 9 years go.
“Good morning.” He says. Pffft. If you say so. Don’t toy with me. There will be no response back, thank you very much.
Shoes are lost. Uniform shirts aren’t clean. SOMEONE forgot to tell me the yogurt drinks for packed lunches are out (what am I, a mind reader). The cat is clawing the priceless Afghan carpet (that my father brought home from Kabul, hand woven by a woman with nothing and here my cat CLAWS at it?!?!). And I am pretty sure it’s going to be overcast and cool today. (Hello? It’s Florida!? We don’t DO imperfect weather.)
And my husband thinks I am unattractive. I don’t get on the Wii Fit enough. I keep eating those damn Hershey’s kisses. What is it with the chocolate lately? And I am quite sure it was planted in my house to make me fat anyway.
Fine so then my husband and son leave for the day. Fine. Just leave me here. Alone with my tantruming two year old where we will be stuck in “same shit, different groundhog day” hell. In 10 minutes I am going to get hassled for a snack and “not that one, not that one either, NOOOOO not THAT one NOOOOOO!!!!!” In an hour I am going to be picking up what didn’t get in a potty. Awesome. And in 5 hours and 23 minutes, I will spend 56 minutes battling said child, wooing him to nap while he refuses to and immediately loses his mind because in actuality he needs that frickin nap like I need my sanity. Like I need those bloody Hershey’s kisses. (Guess whats for lunch.) So good-bye husband. Dessert me again. Go enjoy adults and conversation and quiet trips to the bathroom BY YOURSELF.
Oh and I need to write. That’s right. I need to find inspiration and get about five posts written. Because I need to bust my ass for a job that pays me chump change on a GOOD day. Right. So lets figure out what I’m going to write. Ok. While I sit here alone on groundhog day and get repeatedly whacked by a light saber. Sure. There are so many interesting things to write about that inspire me daily. WHACK. Yes, so many new and fascinating things which happen in my very own house that I must write them ALL down. WHACK. I am simply brimming with inspiration. WHACK WHACK.
So finally, I give up. A shower is my only hope. A shower always helps. Assuming there is still hot water. Assuming the soap isn’t all out leaving me with an empty container in its place or my two year old doesn’t decide to pull the entire entertainment system down on top of himself right when I turn on the water because that could very well happen – he’s plotting it all right now I tell you, cackling evilly to himself.
So, however resigned, I wander into the bathroom. And there I see it. A blue plastic case, popped open and… empty but for the last week of placebo pills.
So I am quite sure by now that I do in fact have a blogger guardian angel. No, I do. And I need to light a candle on her behalf every night and thank her for all she brings my way.
So what is it this time?
Well. I was emailed by a friend/colleague/reader of mine the other day and asked if I would like to be part of an phone interview with (here it is, folks…) Chandra Wilson. She is the enormously talented actor who plays Dr. Bailey on “Greys Anatomy”. It turns out she is a spokesperson for the Treat With Care Campaign and is working with the Consumer Healthcare Products Association to advocate for the safe use of children’s over the counter medication. Would I be interested in participating in the call and interviewing her as a mom blogger?
Um. Yeah. I think so.
Some quick back story here. Now, like households everywhere, I watch “Greys” regularly. It’s a fabulous show. But here’s the thing. Of ALL the characters (McSteamys and McDreamys included), my stand alone, top of the pile, absolute favorite character on that show is Dr. Bailey. Her character is an incredible example of a smart, witty, relatable hard working mother who digs in and scraps for what she believes in. I stand by Dr. Bailey with every episode. Just ask my husband. When the credits roll, I clutch a couch pillow to my heart and confess my solidarity with Dr. Bailey. She simply rocks that show.
And last Friday I got to interview her.
That couch pillow? Yeah, it kind of got thrown in the air a bit.
Ok. So down to the nitty gritty. What is the Treat With Care Campaign all about?
Before we start, I must confess something. I am not sure if this deems me as being highly unprofessional, but I didn’t write down the conversation word for word so I could transcribe the interview exactly as it went here. Sorry about that folks. Color me a wee bit star struck, I got caught up in the convo – talking and writing just wasn’t going to happen. But I did take notes and will do my damnedest to do it all justice here for you. So here we go. (And its a little long but like I care. It’s Chandra Wilson for pete’s sake!)
Once we all called in, we heard a little bit from the Consumer Healthcare Products Association (CHPA). They are a non-profit, consumer focused association supported by the makers of many over the counter medications (OTCs). The Treat With Care Campaign is their initiative to encourage the safe use of children’s OTCs. The USFDA recently changed its OTC recommendations and now suggests they be used for children 4 and older (as opposed to previous labels recommending use for ages 2 and older). And with that, Chandra Wilson was introduced to us as their spokesperson for the Treat With Care Campaign and we were welcomed to ask her questions.
Chandra greeted us all and I couldn’t help but smile. I know that voice! She was very encouraging and certainly seemed happy to speak with us. So, as I gathered myself, rallying whatever bit of professionalism I had, I couldn’t help but think the following:
“Its Dr. frigging BAILEY!!! Ok, she sounds cool. In fact, she seems a whole lot sweeter than what I expected. Like the softer, gentler, more relaxed twin of Dr. Bailey. And shes a mom! And here she is just chatting away with us! Bah! Must not freak out but I SO TOTALLY AM!”
Breathe.
So then it was my turn to ask a question. Anxious, shameless and a little bit starstruck, I jumped right in. As a mother of a 3 year old, I asked her how this campaign has changed how she cares for her son when he has a cough or cold.
She explained to us it has changed her life a great deal. Before, she never thought twice about about treating her child’s cough or cold the way she might treat her own. But since becoming involved in this campaign, she has learned the following tips:
Read labels and never give your child more than the recommended dose
Store medications out of reach AND out of sight of your children. The flavors can be enticing, so she even turns the labels with the cute grapes inward
Never use an OTC for children younger than the recommended age of four or under (unless prescribed otherwise by a doctor)
Never use adult medications for children
Never use any medication for the purpose of making your child sleepy
(Can I just say here that as she was carefully listing these tips, I started slipping back into a “Greys” state of mind. Since she is clearly informed about this topic, she suddenly sounded a little more like Dr. Bailey and I had better listen to these points or else she was going to get the Chief involved and make us interns pay! …Oh for crying outloud. SNAP OUT OF IT CAROLINE! Sheeesh.)
She then talked about how she works hard to focus on nutrition and hydration when her child is sick. And when her little one is truly miserable, she always refers to her Pediatrician for cough or cold medications.
So with the new OTC recommendations, I know that I have been nervous about using any OTCs at all for my children. Are they really safe?
Well, she explained that the problems have occured when parents have misused OTCs or children have taken OTCs on their own and over-dosed. In fact, the FDA found this was occurring more often with children under the age of 4, hence the changes on labels. She told us that this campaign is simply just a good reminder to everyone about how to use OTCs – they are safe if they are used correctly.
So should we always ask a pediatrician before we use an OTC, even if the child is over 4?
(Ugh, duh, was this a stupid question? Whatever. I asked it.)
She said that we should use our common sense as parents. But yes, certainly discuss the use of any meds with our pediatrician. She has found that since she has been involved in this campaign, she always contacts her pediatrician whenever she is in doubt – it’s always better to be safe than sorry.
The other bloggers asked questions too of course, and she was so nice to everyone. (Although I do feel a bit guilty. Maybe I asked too many questions? Maybe I jumped in there too often? My apologies to the other bloggers, I think I sort of lost my mind a bit. Ok. Let it go.) But ultimately, she came back to the same points I’ve already mentioned and made sure to underscore the importance of using OTCs safely. Then the CHPA rep asked us if we had any further questions.
Heh. I did, of course. (Shocker of all shockers.)
I asked Chandra that I was pretty sure all of our readers would love to know how she balances being a mother with such a demanding career.
She explained that she has a great support team in place. She has a day to day schedule and tries to stick with it. And while she has a plan in place, she always makes room for the human factor. Things can change daily and she tries to accommodate accordingly. Sometimes her kids might come to work or maybe one has to get to camp – whatever it is, she just tries to make room for it just like we all do.
And with that, it was time to say good-bye.
Ack. So what did I do? I couldn’t help myself.
While I was thanking her, I just had to get a little gushy. (Groan.) I blurted out that I really appreciate the character she plays since she is a hardworking mother, and she sets such an important example. She said that’s why she loves Dr. Bailey too – she’s real, strong but certainly not perfect. I told her I think that shes fantastic in her role and thanked her for it. And she was so damn nice back. She really was. Did I make a fool of myself gushing a bit there? Eh, maybe. Probably. But who cares. You know why? She has brought such a great character to my Thursday evenings, she SHOULD be thanked you know?
(Ok, Chandra? If luck would have it and you are reading this? I really mean it. Thank you. Dr. Bailey is a fantastic character. And sure sure, its because there are amazing writers for Greys but REALLY. It is *YOU* who makes Dr. Bailey who she is. YOU bring this character to life. You have reached so many people with your fabulous acting and I just have to say it again. Thank you.)
Stop laughing at me, readers o’ mine. Its ok, I can gush NOW. Its my blog, so I can be out of my mind now, its kind of what I do here, right?
But really, the best part of the whole conversation was just how real and relaxed it was. Because she is not a doctor, she is a working mom just like so many of us. We laughed about our kids, we swapped stories, we talked about how important it is to protect our children. And at the end of our half hour, I was a little sad to say good-bye.
So, if you want to see more of Chandra, here are a couple clips you should watch. First, here is the Treat With Care OTC PSA.
And then, this is the real “non Dr. Bailey” Chandra on Ellen. How cool is she? No, really! She is so damn cool, a mom like us, she loves her soaps and she doesn’t know how to work her TIVO. Yup, I really heart her. (I know, enough with the gushing, but I can’t make any more of a fool of myself here than I already have right?…) – so… rock on Chandra!!!
Thank you again, Chandra Wilson and CHPA for this opportunity.
This is my thirdpost in a series written to honor Women’s History Month. My life has been profoundly influenced and affected by women writing and advocating on my behalf. And now, as I spend my days in a thinking, blogging, posting frenzy, I fancy myself a writer of sorts too. So, it’s high time I acknowledge the women that inspire. Here is my list of top 20 recommended women political bloggers, in no particular order.
Before we get started, please note that I did ask my fellow bloggers and readers who they read also. So this list includes my favorites along with those who have been recommended to me.
Ok then. Here we go.
1. Momocrats: While this is in no particular order, I still must put the Momocrats at the top of my list. As hardworking mothers and progressive thinkers, it often seems as if these women are speaking and advocating exclusively on my behalf when I read their posts. They are amazing writers, they know what they are talking about and the world is sitting up to listen to them.
2. Punditmom is my “go to” political blogger. When something is going down, I want to know what a smart, liberal minded, feminist pundit has to say about it. PM comes through for me every time. And sometimes you’ll even catch her speaking her mind on CNN and Fox too.
3. Julie Pippert is probably smarter than all of us put together. She’s extremely well informed, passionate about her politics and is a mother like so many of us.
4. Queen of Spain is kind of political blogger celeb in my mind. She landed an interview with President Obama during the election and has been seen on TV and at major political events ever since.
5. Writes Like She Talks is a fantastic political blogger and has written for Newsweek.com, has made several appearances on CNN and is a columnist. She is certainly a political blogger to be reckoned with.
6. Sairy is a Momocrat who’s found herself reporting from a White House Press conference, amongst other things. Here is her full bio – she is an important voice worth following.
7. Angry Black Bitch: Straight forward, very brilliant and never afraid, I met Shark-Fu on my first day of BlogHer 08 and have been reading her ever since.
8. Viva La Feminista writes as a feminist, Latina and mother – her voice is powerful, her message is important.
9. Mombian is an established lesbian family blog which discusses political topics affecting rights (or lack thereof) for same sex parents.
10. Feministing “is an online community for feminists and their allies.” The women here have created a talented and diverse community as they advocate for equal and human rights.
Other blogs recommended to me:
11. Citizen Jane Politics is described as an un-partisan, independent, political blog from women.
12. Blonder Than You is a DC blogger shooting straight from the hip, so to speak.
13. Women Wired In is a blog created for and about women, politics and technology.
14. Bang the Drum describes herself as a die-hard democrat and political junkie. She’s also a mom of three and lives in CA.
16. The Feministe: To quote directly from their bio, “Feministe is one of the oldest feminist blogs designed by and run by women from the ground up.” Now go read it.
17. The Little Pink Clubhouse claims that she has a “consuming interest in politics” and writes from a small town outside Seattle.
18. HeartFeldt Politics is written by Gloria Feldt, a women’s activist whose voice is heard – and read – everywhere from the Huffington Post to the New York Times.
19. Womanist is written by a mother who describes herself as a pacifist, anti-racist and humanist – oh yeah, and a woman-ist.
20. The Political Voices of Women: If 20 women political bloggers just aren’t enough for you, check out the Political Voices of Women where you will find over 500 women telling it how it is.
For all that these bloggers do to keep me informed and advocate on my behalf, I am grateful. Happy Women’s History Month to all of these political bloggers and the women they reach.
I finally did it. I got my act together and outfitted this little blog with some big girl clothes. She’s all grown up now – she’s self hosted!
Thanks to the wonderfully talented Shannon at Phat Mommy, I was able to get this girl in her high heels, stick a fab dress on her and have her tromping around the blogosphere like she owns the place.
Well. I dunno. I mean, this blog is not exactly the heels type, I suppose.
This is a mom blog, with suburban peace loving, hippie tendencies. She still loves the wilds of Florida in her backyard and her practical Saturn parked her garage. And she has a living room floor covered in star wars toys and cold mac n cheese in her frig.
But she still gets feisty. She still wants to see change happen. She still speaks her mind. She still calls it like she sees it.
(Even if she really reeeeally hates offending anyone.)
So, here we are. One year older, one year wiser, one year of confidence and a whole lot prettier. Heels or flip flops, Vivienne Tam or Target – this blog is growing up. And I am pretty damn proud of her.
This picture of an AIDS poster was taken by me in Mozambique, ‘92.
No disrespect to my Catholic peeps, truly. I have been hesitant to publish this post because offending any one’s religious beliefs just isn’t my thing. But I read this article from the BBC. And then my husband forwarded another article to me. And it got me angry. So to hell with it (literally), I just have to say something about this.
Breathe.
The Pope has arrived in Africa. And he is suggesting – no – he is urging African citizens not to use condoms to prevent AIDS. He has flown to Africa to let folks there know that abstinence is the only answer to the AIDS epidemic.
He says that to the people of Africa.
A continent where it is projected that by 2025, 80 million people (10% of the continent) will die from AIDS (BBC).
And lets take the wonderful country of Swaziland for instance, where I spent 5 years growing up. Currently, almost 30% of the adult population in Swaziland has HIV or AIDS (honestly, I have heard from folks living there that this rate is as high as 50% but will report what I have found). Children are raising children on the streets, with no way of knowing how to sustain themselves or care for the babies on their hips. Why? Because their parents are dead. The fabric of this wonderful country has been forever changed because of the human void it is suffering with right now. People are simply just dead.
Why? Because they had unprotected sex with an infected partner.
This is a crises of epic, massive, earth shifting proportions. And the Pope says just stop having sex? That we really just have to keep our morals in check here? You know, go to church, stop having sex and all our problems will be solved?
Um, Mr. Pope (which I say with utmost honest respect), did you know the King of Swaziland has multiple wives? Its tradition there, no disrespect to the King, but multiple wives happens in Swaziland. Or did you know young girls are being raped and infected because it is rumored that having sex with a virgin ”cures” AIDS? Did you know that until recently many people weren’t convinced AIDS even existed at all? We need birth control and education – not empty promises of God’s salvation if we simply keep our legs shut.
Reality check: Sex happens. And will continue to happen. No matter how hard you pray it away, sex will happen (as it does in all over the world), with multiple partners. Often. Even after heartfelt promises of church going and abstinence are declared publicly, sex will keep on keeping on.
Oh and people having sex aren’t bad people by the way. Just for the record.
So what is the only shot we’ve got at curbing the spread of AIDS in Africa? Education and CONDOMS. (Along with access to HIV medications.)
But really, I am just afraid that there will be only two responses to the Pope’s suggestion of picking abstinence over condoms. 1) He will either be laughed at (which isn’t doing the Pope or the Catholic church and its mission any good at all anyway) or (2) condoms will be thrown aside because “the pope said so” – and then all that we have left is their blood on the Pope’s hands.
My hope is that the Pope’s trip to Africa will be eye-opening. I hope he can bring back to the Catholic church some first hand accounts about whats really happening there. Clearly I am not Catholic but I am forever the optimist. So I can hope.
And then I do have comfort knowing that he’ll certainly do one thing constructively. He’ll join the rest of the world as we pray for the souls of each person threatened by this horrible virus.
But Mr. Pope? Sir? Let’s just try to actually save some of them too, ok?
In honor of Women’s History Month, last week I took on the daunting task of listing some top women television journalists that deserve our support. I would like to continue to honor this month by attempting to list top political newspaper journalists, columnists and editors who deserve the same kind of respect, support and place in history. And for a final tribute next week, I will tackle my list of top twenty liberal women political bloggers.
Women are now expected voices during political dialogue – speaking their minds and taking names, so to speak. But how did we get here? After all, we have only had the right to vote since 1920 (a mere 90 years ago) and finally had our first shot at a woman President only in the past year. Wouldn’t you know it, women have been affecting the political scene long before we were voting and have been fighting for their spot on the soapbox in the male dominated field of journalism ever since. Did you know that the International Federation of Journalists reported that only of 38% of working journalists are women?
So as a woman blogger, political junkie and proud feminist, I would like to tip my laptop to the following women of note:
Marguerite Higgins was the first woman to win a Pulitzer prize for international reporting in 1951.
Ethel Payne covered the civil rights movement and became the first African American commentator employed by a major news network (CBS) in 1972.
Ida M. Tarbell was inducted into the National Women’s Hall of Fame for her historical investigative reporting about the Standard Oil company at the turn of the century.
Margaret Fuller was the first writer for the New York Tribune in the mid 1800s and was also the first female foreign and war correspondent.
Nellie Bly is famous for her undercover work as a journalist who faked her insanity so that she could report on the inner workings of a mental institution in the late 1800’s.
Katherine Graham was a Pulitzer prize winning author and managing editor of the Washington Post during the explosive early 70s when the Post unearthed the truth about Nixon.
Nancy Hicks Maynard was the first African American female reporter for the New York Times and former owner of the Oakland Tribune.
Ellen Goodman is a Pulitzer prize winning columnist who has focused her career on bringing attention to the women’s movement while writing a nationally recognized syndicated column.
Anna Quindlen is a Pulitzer prize winning journalist who, in 1990, became the third woman in history to write a regular column for the New York Times Op-Ed page.
Helen Thomas was the first female member and president of the While House Correspondents Association and has been in the white house press corps since JFK, sitting front and center of every white house press conference. (See image above.)
Arianna Huffington was named as one of Time’s worlds 100 most influential people and is the co founder of the Huffington Post.
Margaret Carlson was the first female columnist at Time magazine and is now a columnist at Bloomberg News.
IN 1937, the National Federation of Press Women was founded. For a list of accomplished women journalists found in their Hall of Fame, please visit their site.
With such amazing journalists and inspiring women preparing the ground for future female writers, it is no surprise that such a fabulous crop of political bloggers have sprung forth today, enlightening, demanding and questioning the political arena at large. So who are my favorites? You’ll have to wait until next week when I will finally reveal my top twenty favorite political bloggers. Until then, happy Women’s History Month!
By now you should know that I won’t do a review on Morningside Mom unless there is something about that product that truly impresses me. Well, I have another one for you. Toms Shoes approached me and asked that I review a pair of shoes for them. But these aren’t just a pair of shoes. In case you don’t know about Toms Shoes, I am going to tell you what makes this specific shoe company so very special.
The Toms Shoes company was started by Blake Mycoskie after he visited Argentina and noticed how many children did not have any shoes. His dream for this company was to create a shoe that he could sell and give away. Let me explain further. He wanted his company to make it possible to donate one pair of shoes to a child in need with every one purchased. That’s right. And he did. After one year, he and his family and friends were ready to donate over 10,000 shoes to children in Argentina. Next stop was South Africa where he and his crew dropped off 50,000 shoes. And in 2008 it was planned that they donate over 200,000 shoes worldwide.
Ok, now watch this.
Pretty amazing, right?
Ok, so lets get down to the shoes themselves. What did I think?
Well, in terms of style, I was a liiiittle nervous. I’ll admit, I was worried they’d be kind of like grandma shoes. I am just being honest here. I wasn’t sure they’d really be my style. So I looked through all the various patterns available online and went for a fun “Element” shoe style. At least I knew these shoes wouldn’t look anything like what Grandma would wear.
But here’s the thing. When I got them, they actually looked a lot cooler than I expected. I was pleasantly surprised. And my favorite part about the shoes? When I slipped them on, I didn’t want to take them off. Because, my friend, they’re like butta. So dang comfy. Granted, they don’t have a ton of support – these are flat shoes made of canvas. But they are well made and I really, truly never want to take them off. (Maybe I should get Grandma a pair, I think she wouldn’t take them off either.)
Now down to the fun part.
It’s giveaway time!
I have the DVD of their award winning documentary about their first shoe drop in Argentina and a coupon code worth $50 in Tom’s Shoes to give away to a Morningside Mom reader.
How do you enter? Leave a comment below about a time you’ve given back to your community or something you would like to do for your community. Real answers please, don’t just respond with some general Ms. America “I want to save the world” comment. Think about it for the sake of making change happen – like Toms Shoes has.
I will pick a winner at random on Monday March 16th.
It should come as no surprise that I was glued to my television this morning. The Digital Moms series on the Today Show has me sucked in. After being somewhat disappointed by yesterday’s show and the impression it gave viewers, I was ready for something better today. In fact, I was excited because I knew some of the women featured this time. Well, ok, so I actually met Wendy aka eMom at Seaworld but only knew Melissa aka @Consumer Queen and Amber aka @JerseyMomma from twitter. Amber was actually backstage brainstorming with producers during the segment. But STILL. I was behind them, and I had a feeling they’d come through.
So I poured a really reeeeeally big bowl of Cheerios for my thrilled two year old, and saddled up in front of the TV with my laptop – a twitter window open and ready to go. While I waited, Amber and Wendy sent tweets from the green room and the Digital Moms responded with all sorts of support. Melissa’s portion of the show had been filmed from her her home so she anxiously waited for the piece to start right along with us. Trusting that these woman knew what they were doing, and having read Wendy’s tweets from the day before, I had a good feeling about this segment.
Right away a cheer went up across twitter as Melissa (Consumer Queen) showed viewers that all of the products she reviews have come as a result of “a lot of hard work”. She reiterated the importance of her perspective to consumers and the narrator followed up by noting that Melissa is “influencing corporate America” and listed some of the big corporations that have asked for Melissa’s review.
Phew! Yes. Finally. Thank you. It seems this segment would be taking the impact of Digital Moms seriously.
Next the Today Show mentioned the example of the Motrin Ad. Someone on twitter posted “OMG they’re talking about the Motrin Ad!!!” Yes, any digital moms who were on twitter last fall will remember the Motrin Ad well. In November, Motrin released a new ad campaign with some pretty condescending phrasing about baby wearing – women everywhere were insulted. No, really, it was bad. Twitter and blogs alike exploded. Horrified. Outraged. What were they thinking? I am fairly sure it took about 48 hours of this sort of uproar from Digital Moms before Motrin pulled the entire ad campaign. For a summary, ready Crunchy Domestic Goddess’s post about it here. It’s only one example of many who blogged their opinion about the Motrin Ad campaign. And guess what? The company heard these women loud and clear. Why? Because these women are affecting the the success (or not) of a product simply by responding professionally with strong, heartfelt, honest writing.
Once the intro piece was over, Ann began her interview with Wendy and Terri Walter – an advertising Executive from Razorfish Media. They did a fabulous job. I appreciated that immediate focus was given to women as important influencers, not just as women looking for a bunch of free stuff. They underscored how much heart and soul goes into their work. Digital Moms care about what they are doing and take it very seriously. The relationships that bloggers build with readers was emphasized as extraordinarily valuable and full disclosure with readers was the only way to maintain such a relationship. I could not have agreed more when Terri stated that pressure is then put on the product to stand up to real consideration since these women will speak their minds in their review.
And finally Wendy made sure to say that digital moms are “making a difference and changing lives out there”. She disagreed when Ann asked her if this was all just a passing trend. “It’s just the beginning”, marketing has changed thanks to word of mouth and “consumers expect to have a voice, there’s no going back.”
And that’s exactly it. There is no going back. Products are finding success or not based on these women’s opinions. A fancy ad campaign with all the bells and whistles is just not enough anymore. Consumers are always skeptical. They want to hear real opinions from real people. They want to see someone kick the tires and tell them the honest to God truth. And that’s where we come in.
So I’ll say it again.
I am Digital Mom, here me post.
(Ok, no. That just sounds cheesy the second time around…)
Nevertheless, my panties are in less of a bunch today. I am feeling more optimistic about this series now. And I do realize that any focus on what digital moms do is a good thing. You women rocked out today. I’ll certainly be posting some more on this as the week goes on. Cheers.
**UPDATE**
I just DMed Amber aka @jerseymomma to ask if another segment was on this morning (3/11) since I never saw one. She let me know that it seems the series was only Monday (3/9) and Tuesday (3/10). But she did say that the producers were very excited about this topic and she is hopeful they will do more in the future.
So that’s it for now I guess. To sum it all up, digital moms seemed defined by the Today Show as very social mom bloggers who get free stuff and influence corporations if we work really really hard at what we do.
Hmmmm. I think there’s room for more on this topic, don’t you?
So while changing a funky diaper this morning, I happened to have on the Today Show. I usually get about a half hour with Meredith and Matt before I am onto other things in my day. And it was probably going to be switched off right after that diaper change had I not heard the intro to a series about “Digital Moms”.
Wait a second. That’s me!
C’s “Pull Up” got pulled up right quick, I hastily ushered him over to his favorite chalk board and ran back to turn up the volume. And this is what I watched.
Initially I was excited. Yes, here’s focus being given to moms and all that they can do from home and online! So cool!
Um… hold on. Did the Today Show really portray what a “digital mom” is truly all about?
I know its only the first part of the series but so far, I am a little disappointed. Here are my thoughts.
First of all, every woman should in fact follow Laura Fortner’s advice. Yes, use the Internet anyway you need to. If that means finding support groups while you wrestle life as a parent, do it. By all means. Its WAY cheaper than therapy. I’ve got great online friends who have supported me through good and bad. I get it. Women SHOULD connect this way.
And I most certainly use twitter and facebook socially (as well as to promote what I do). In this bloggy world, you have to make personal connections with people if anyone is to take you seriously. That’s the irony about blogging. While it seems rather anti-social to work alone at a computer – it is actually interactive, personal work. But twitter and facebook are certainly not the be all and end all for me. I take no issue if that’s all some moms use the Internet for, just as long as twitter and facebook aren’t what “digital moms” are defined by.
However, the Today Show seemed to portray the digital mom as a social Internet butterfly flitting from one social network to another, hardly offering anything of much value, prioritizing their iphones and laptops over time with their children.
And here’s the funny thing. Businesses and PR companies actually get what digital moms are all about. (Think back to that all expenses paid trip to NYC I just went on.) Why do they get it? Because mothers are the ones spending the money and digital moms are the ones writing about where they spend it. And digital moms are not some untrained variety of advertisers, happy to plug any product for free stuff. These moms tell it how it is, the good, the bad and the ugly. Consumers are drawn to these women’s perspectives because they write well, they write from the heart and lots of people follow what they have to say.
But I do have to say this. The Today Show isn’t the only one scrambling to get it. As my friend Mary pointed out to me today, you have to be in it, to get it. And that is so true. I can’t tell you how many times my friends eyes glaze over when I talk about blogging. And I take no offense at all. Because writing and connecting and working online isn’t everyone’s bag. We all do our own thing, its all good.
But if you are a news source, wouldn’t you try a little harder to get it and not just piece together a cute story about what seems to be a new cyber hobby for bored moms?
So anyway, its only the start of a series. Maybe I have my panties in a bunch way too soon. I could be jumping the gun, this could be really great for all digital moms. Still, I did send a message to @todayshow on Twitter today asking them to consider attending the Blogher conference in Chicago. If they still don’t get it by the end of this series, that conference will set them straight. BlogHer represents the diversity, the smarts and the know how of real digital moms today. And it’s something to be reckoned with.
Well, I’ve had my say. I promise to stay tuned into the series. (Wendy aka @eMom will be on tomorrow. I was lucky enough to meet her at Seaworld. Go Wendy!) I will certainly post later in the week with my perspective once again. “Oh great”, I hear you groan.
In the final week of Women’s History Month, I have decided to tackle a topic that has been on my mind for awhile. It is not so much a topic actually but rather an item of clothing. A few years back, my father returned from his time in Afghanistan with a gift. He brought his westernized, feminist, know it all daughter something extraordinary and like nothing I owned. He brought me a burqa. I want to share this burqa with you and try to respectfully encourage some awareness about the experience of wearing this article of clothing in a country very different from our own.
So I have tried on my burqa many times and here is what this western woman experienced. First of all, the burqa is hot. I guess they used to be made of more breathable cotton but newer ones are made with synthetic material so that they keep their color and their creases. And it is very hard to see through the burqa, but maybe I’m just not used to it. Also I initially thought my head was really big because the top of the burqa did not fit on my head well, it was constricting. After doing further research, I have learned this is typical for most women wearing one and it is not comfortable at all. And finally, its not at all easy to breathe in. There is no vent for the nose or mouth. I just can’t breathe in it for long. That’s why I always take it right off. I can’t breathe. I feel claustrophobic and closed in. So chasing children? Carrying food back from the store? I can’t imagine.
And finally, a quick note. Do you know where I keep my burqa? It is kept in my closet, draped over the box which contains my carefully preserved wedding dress. It just seems fitting. After all, we too wear constricting garments which are expected of us. It’s just what women do here.
So I am quite sure by now that I do in fact have a blogger guardian angel. No, I do. And I need to light a candle on her behalf every night and thank her for all she brings my way.
This picture of an AIDS poster was taken by me in Mozambique, ‘92.
The Toms Shoes company
But here’s the thing. When I got them, they actually looked a lot cooler than I expected. I was pleasantly surprised. And my favorite part about the shoes? When I slipped them on, I didn’t want to take them off. Because, my friend, they’re like butta. So dang comfy. Granted, they don’t have a ton of support – these are flat shoes made of canvas. But they are well made and I really, truly never want to take them off. (Maybe I should get Grandma a pair, I think she wouldn’t take them off either.)
It should come as no surprise that I was glued to my television this morning. The Digital Moms series on the Today Show has me sucked in. After being somewhat disappointed by 
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